“Love is made up of two components – commitment and emotion. The commitment part, I have 100% for you,” he said. “And the second part, which is the butterflies, the feelings, the romance…that… I have none for you.”
This is how my husband, Nelson, proposed to me.
“But I’m sure the Lord will give me the love…so, are you willing to be my wife?”
Not the marriage proposal I envisioned, clearly. But I knew my future was with him, so I shed a couple of tears, and said yes.
Perhaps I am destined to be the unloved wife, I thought. But I trusted too much in God’s goodness!
“It worked out for Isaac and Rebekah in the Bible, so I think it will work out for us too,” Nelson semi-joked. “The twelve tribes of Israel came from them.” It was a small comfort.
God had told him months before that I was to be his wife, but he didn’t tell anyone. His prayer was that the Lord would reveal it independently to his parents so they could have a hand in choosing his bride. In this way he could honor both his parents and his culture.
We decided that our mutual agreement to get married according to God’s will on this day, was our engagement. No ring, no swell of romantic emotions, nada. We refer to that day as Brutal Tuesday.
We recently celebrated our 8th wedding anniversary, so things worked out. Nelson’s lack of feelings lasted all of two weeks. Since then, he has been the mushier, more affectionate partner, hands down.
God writes the best love stories!
You can read more about our love story here.