Sad woman thinking collage

Still Hurting and I am not Sure Sometimes…


I have read Testimony Share all the time and this is my first time posting…don’t ask me why this time but hopefully I can get some prayers my way to help me on the road/journey that I am on.

In a nutshell, I was in a very long-term common-law relationship that ended because I wanted to start a family. We both in our late 30’s and we met in our mid 20’s. Over the years, while together, I tried not to push the topic. I tried to give him space and let him decide. But the yearning to start a family with the person that I was in love with for the past 10 years, just made logical sense, of course only to me.

I am at this stage in life now and I wonder if I wasted my years and if it is too late to have a child on my own. I sometimes wonder if I will meet someone that will want the same things I do.

I’ve always been and still a religious person…I’ve kept my faith. When my friends tell me that I should have gone ahead and had a kid with my ex without him knowing…I just could not.

Maybe I was simple minded to think that my ex would finally come around, even when we re-connected (he reached out to me) for the 2nd time around – which was summer of last year – we broke up January 2010. But only to be told, he wants to travel and enjoy life and having a kid requires too much money.

So, in a nutshell because writing my story will require me to re-read what I’ve written, and the tears will never stop – so I am trying to be strong but sometimes I sometimes don’t know.

I try not to feel bad some days but of course, when I see couples or a mother with a child or father with a child, it just takes my inner strength to look away.

Thanks for reading and listening.


  1. iamredeemed 3/17/2011
  2. Sibusiso-South Africa 4/15/2011
  3. Amber Keys 5/9/2011
  4. AsianJesusLover 5/9/2011

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