Overcoming Testimony from my Past

God is amazing and good. He doesn’t want us to allow our circumstances to overwhelm us. Was raised in an abusive background, told it was normal cuz we were african american, never questioned the abuse. Alcholism, domestic violence and verbal abuse. I thought it was how most people my age grew up. Struggled with violent family members, but now that I am older realize that God is my hiding place. Family who threatened me, my life and my other family members haunt me. Constant choas in the home, made me emotionally unstable, prone to depression and violent tendencies. Became addicted to pornography at the age of 8, because of distant relationship with parents. Felt like I had a hole in my heart from the constant fighting bickering, and verbal attacks on me. one parent would abuse the other, then they would verbally abuse me. tell me my talents were no good, and i was worthless. Stupid, you name it. pretty messed up situation. Became pretty promiscious in middle and high school due to the over exposure to pornography. Pretty messed up. dated alot of guys, had broken relationships, but went to school, had alot of money. Almost ended up in prison. Moved away from home, then when got around old people, lost job and children and wasn’t able to have a child or a marriage. could keep a just. almost got into trouble with the law. Was suicidal and wanted to kill myself. Wouldn’t do it because was my mom’s only child and she had been so abused. Couldn’t do that. in the midst of all the drama, I was a muslim, but later became a christian. God is healing my heart and hurts, delivering from the need to be married,(cuz i had a broken engagement) Became an artist and writer, still waiting on the LORD. God is good, I am not dead, in jail or crazy. I give Him all the praise. learning how to forgive family that abused me, for losing my children and even the husband I had wanted. Thanking God for blocking disasters from happening to me and a bad marriage. PS 91, He has angels watching over me and healing my heart. Amen. Give praise to God for the wonderful things He has done.

2 Comments

  1. kristin 4/15/2010
  2. melissa ramirez 7/26/2011

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