Women Suffering Pain

Feeling Ashamed. What Should I Do?

I have been stressed with school lately. And a while back I realized that I prioritized school work over spending time with God. I would still read the Bible at least twice a day, but I feel like I was reading it for the sake of reading it. I didn’t feel the desire I used to have (when I got saved).

Then last week I went on a 3 day fast for the purpose of drawing near to God and asking for academic success since the next coming weeks were going to get hectic. I had a quiz coming on the day after my last fast day. I prayed to God asking for wisdom, understanding being able to remember what I had studied. I also prayed for a peace of mind, that I wouldn’t get anxious or stressed out while writing my quiz (this was for my hardest class).

I then felt better and continued on studied knowing God would take of it and I just had to do my best. Test day comes I was reviewing in the morning and prayed a few minutes before we started. This was done online and we were allowed to use our notes and textbook.

However, time went quickly and I knew I wouldn’t be able to completely finish. So, for 2 of the questions I googled them (though I ended up using only one of them). And the answer to the question could have been found in the notes but it would have take longer so I just used the one I found online. Then I submitted my quiz. I hadn’t finished it but I felt I would get a higher mark then the last two quizzes.

I felt disappointed in myself after. I had done a fast on developing my relationship with God. Trying to make my faith bigger only to google an answer later. I repented and asked God forgiveness I prayed that I wouldn’t do something like that again.

The thing is I have more assignments, quizzes and exams coming soon. But, I feel ashamed about what I did. And I feel like I can’t ask God for assistance on studying. I know this is a lie from the devil. But I don’t want to feel like I am just using him for school. I feel like I don’t have enough faith for him to help me in time. What should I do?

3 Comments

  1. Tom Sprague 4/3/2021
  2. Sunday Akodu 4/3/2021
  3. Mike Henry Sr. 4/6/2021

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