Ship couple

Will God Give Him Back To Me?

It has been weeks since I’ve broken up with the person I’m convinced to be ‘the one’. I was so miserable due to him being the first and only guy I’ve ever actually loved in my whole life. I had ex’s and didn’t feel anything with them like I did with this guy. In fact, he brought me closer to God.

I was born and raised a catholic, but I chose to be an atheist. For the last 16 years, I’ve always been stubborn and difficult. Nothing or nobody could influence or change my mind once it’s set.

I’ve never thought this guy could either, until a few weeks into the relationship I found myself looking into applying to OCAD, totally opposite from my lifelong dream of returning to Vancouver due to him wanting me to be close to him. I’ve also started trying to believe in God. I had some experiences with what my mom would consider miracles but I’ve yet to believe. It’s not easy for me to suddenly turn back to God after those years.

If God has created a guy for me, it’s him. I prayed and prayed. I asked God why he would take a guy that actually made me turn back to him away. Could this possibly be his plan? Is there a reason behind this at all? I still have hopes that one day. Maybe… Just maybe…