I first got exposed to pornography around 7-8 years old. That started my addiction to pornography and masturbating. That same year my parents figured out I was visiting bad sites and sinning. They got me into trouble. After that I stopped watching pornography but at around 12 years old, I fell into reading provocative books online. With that came the sin of masturbating.
I felt so guilty after falling into that sin. And I fell very often. At first, I was doing it willfully, but it came to a point where I wanted to stop. Being freed from this addiction that plagued me from an early age was harder than I thought. It was for me, practically impossible. When I would not want to sin, I would sin. When I ran from this sin, it would practically overtake me every time. I desperately wanted to be free because I knew that masturbating was wrong.
One night, I was facing temptation. I promised God that I wouldn’t sin. I ended up breaking that promise and sinning. I felt even more guilty and convicted. Then, again I promised God that that was the last time I would sin, but that same night I fell. Two times in a row. Not only was I practicing impurity, but I was also lying to God.
A few nights later, again I faced temptation. This time I was honest with God. I got on my knees and told God that I don’t want to sin, but I can’t resist the temptation. I said to God that if He didn’t help me fight this temptation, I couldn’t overcome. I asked for His help to set me free. Thay night resisted temptation trusting in God’s help, but again, I failed.
I was confused and disappointed, but somehow, I had a new confidence that this time I didn’t fight and lose on my own, but the Lord was helping me and training me. The following time, same thing, even asking the Lord to help me fight I still fell. And I feel miserably. I felt like I wanted to give up. But the next time I faced temptation, the battle wasn’t that ha4d anymore, even though I fell. The next time I won the battle with the Lord’s help.
As the months gone on, I was barely masturbating (thanks be to God!) But I still fell once in a while, and I didn’t understand why. I understood I could fight the temptation in my own strength and needed God but still something was lacking. After searching the web on how to be free from masturbating (not that many websites actually talk about this sadly, and the world practically has no resources to help but they rather condone masturbating as a healthy practice), I saw that the number one way of getting freedom is by telling someone.
This was very hard for me, and I just could bring myself to talk to anyone about it. The thought of talking about it tormented me but the sin of masturbating also tormented me. I remember one day knowing that I should tell someone… but who? By reasons God only knows, I was led to talk to my dad about my struggle. A daughter talking to her dad about this struggle?! It may seem extreme but out of everyone I knew. I had peace talking to me dad about it.
When the day came for me to bring it up to my dad, I was struggling to get myself to actually start the conversation. So, I told the Lord “I literally can’t do this. I can’t talk about it, so Lord, if you want me to talk about this, you need to talk for me. And will that I told my dad and after that the battle with the temptation of masturbating became very easy, to the point where I was very surprised.
A light shone on my sin and the darkness was exposed. When the darkness was exposed by light, it lost its power. I have now been clean (solely by God’s grace) for about 3 years (I am 20 now). In these years I have fallen only a few times. This is solely by God’s grace. Every time I face sexual temptation, I give the battle to the Lord and ask Him to fight for me. I have also changed my life habits to keep me as far from temptation as possible. These changes include:
- staying away from provocative movies, literature, photos, songs, convos (this is a sacrifice, but I am thankful I can make it by God’s grace (im not like perfect or too strict about it but I try my best)
- when I face temptation, I make an outward sign of disagreeing with the sin (ex. I shake my head ‘no’ when I face the temptation to take the battle outside of just my mind)
- unfollowing people (even some friends) on social media that post provocative post.
- I followed and liked a bunch of Chistian accounts and posts and spent time searching ‘Christian’ content or ‘nature’ content on insta to change my ‘For you’ page algorithm
- spend time with God and bible (aiming for at least 1 chapter a day)
If you are struggling with the sin or masturbating and/or watching pornography, you can try implementing similar changes in your daily habits and I mentioned above. But most importantly be honest with God and also acknowledge (for yourself even) that you cannot get unaddicted alone (just try it lol) but need God’s help. Also tell someone that you are struggle (for your own sake, to weaken the power of sin).
Also, a practical tip and you are being freed from this addiction is to not count on getting proud of how long you haven’t fallen. This will help you from getting proud and forgetting that this is God freeing you and keeping you clean. If you get proud about how long you’ve been clean, watch out cuz most of the time, that’s when you fall.
Another thing to mention is that there are soooo many benefits of being clean from masturbating!!
God bless you all and I hope this helps someone who wants to be free from masturbating. God loves you. Let me know if you have any questions.
Glory To God
Thank you for your testimony. Please pray for me. I was exposed to porn beginning at 5 or 6 yrs old. I’m now 53 and still haven’t been able to completely break free from masturbating. Even if it’s just one prayer, I’ll take it. Thank you. -Dave in AR
Anything that influences one’s life negativity is a bondage. Addiction is a bondage. Bondage takes over one’s spirit, soul and body. For one to be totally delivered then one’s spirit, soul and body must be delivered.
The body (flesh) will be delivered through restriction of the body from the source of what is causing the influence. This could result in pain for the body but later the body will adjust to the new development. You must cut off from porn and anything that could make you to think about the act.
The soul (mind) will be delivered through motivational words to renew one’s mind.
The best motivational words that could renew anyone’s mind are the words of God. That is, expose yourself to sound word of God and by this, your mind shall be renewed.
The spirit could only be delivered by the anointing (Isaiah 10:27). It is only the power of God that can break the power of bondage and addiction from one’s spirit. Therefore, go and seek for the anointing of God upon your life.
If all these three deliverances are in place, then you are totally liberated. But if only one or two is/are liberated, then the two or one left will contaminate the other(s) after a while.
If you are not yet saved, you need to first make your way right with your creator. You need to first accept Jesus as your Lord and saviour as you confess your sin. If you are already saved, then you need to rededicate your life onto God. Then ask God to break the root of sin (masturbation etc) from you. Ask God for the grace of sanctification (holiness) to rest upon you and make you holy. Ask God to sustain the victory forever in you.
May the Lord break whatever bondage in your life this hour, in Jesus name, Amen.
Shalom
Thanks for breaking this down into body, soul and spirit, Sunday. About “delivered by the anointing (Isaiah 10:27)”, I don’t see anointing mentioned there but this scripture applies don’t you think?
God Bless, bro.
How does one walk in the Spirit? Do you walk in the Spirit through your strength?
Jesus told His disciplines to wait until they are empowered by the Holy Spirit before they can then go out to minister to people effectively. We saw this fulfilled on the day of the Pentecost as the Holy Spirit came upon them. They then went everywhere manifesting the power of God as people are saved and delivered from the powers of darkness. Also, Paul and Barnabas were empowered by the Holy Spirit before being launched out for mission work and we saw the great work they did. Therefore, as children of God we need to be endued with power before we can carry out any task. It is this power from God that will enable us to walk in the Spirit and to carry out any task.
People are held down in bondage by the powers of hell, so for anyone to be free from their bondage, he/she must be empowered by God. This power of God upon us is called the anointing.
It takes anointing for yokes, burden, bondage etc to be broken. May the Lord always place His fresh oil upon us every moment so that we shall be able to walk effectively in the Spirit.
Shalom
It sounds like you believe the anointing and the power of the Holy Spirit are the same. I think anointing has a more specific meaning in scripture.
Thanks for your comments, Sunday and to Nat for this testimony. Some further scriptures for anyone who may be reading.
[Edited]
Dave, we share similar backgrounds to porn exposure at an early age and now I’m my early 50s. Its a daily battle, engagement and surrender to God. Praying for you.
Thankyou for the testimony, it helps me regain my spirit to trust in the HOLY SPIRIT, IN Jesus name Amen
My name is austine eyo, from nigeria, i need prayers am really trying to stop masturbation, but i struggle to stop and fail always, i need help.
Please Sunday I need your Whatsapp contact for the inspiration christian empowering conversations.
This is my Facebook contact: http://www.facebook.com/sunday.akodu.1