Sad woman thinking collage

Still Searching

I’m 13 and in 8th grade. I’m a Seventh Day Adventist and was baptized into the church…so I call myself a Christian; but I don’t feel like one. I’ve been having problems lately…

I’ve become very emotional. I began to cry for every little thing and wouldn’t know why…all I knew was that this type of behavior wasn’t healthy. I would call myself names such as: ugly, stupid, fat, untalented and worthless. I didn’t call myself these names because I was just upset…I actually feel like I’m those things.

Ever since my grades dropped…including my music (which I’m supposed to be good at) I became very upset at myself. I once screamed at my reflection saying,

“I hate you!”

I’m really depressed these days… and I start to write poems that show my feelings. I don’t remember the last time I prayed or the reason why I go to church. But I know that I feel like crap.

I’m starting to be afraid. I didn’t quite know what my fears were, but I know now. I’m afraid of death…that I won’t make it to the kingdom of God…that one day I might just die unsaved. I’m really sad…plz help me someone.


  1. Anders Branderud 12/12/2009
  2. Sarah 12/13/2009
  3. K Sartor 12/24/2009
  4. Grace Fetterman 1/1/2010
  5. marcus 1/12/2010
  6. Brian 3/2/2010
  7. kristin 4/15/2010
  8. Melissa 5/12/2010
  9. ElizaJean 5/18/2010

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