Kindly pray for me. I have known endless tears. I am dying slowly and painfully. No water, no shelter, no peace.
My life, a tragedy, a heartbreaking verse.
I am left with nothing. Just tears, just sorrows, just pain.
Join me pray that the lord should take me home and I should go and rest.
Please how can I have the courage to end a life. Is it a sin if I chose to go home now? Will God understand my pains if I commit suicide?
Don’t do it. I love you whoever you are. Jesus is here with us. Stay strong I’m praying for you
Plavious, I am praying for you now. You believe. Is Jesus your Lord and King? Please share more and others may be able to help.
Emory,
I too, am praying for Plavious. But with his situation comes the sensitive subject of suicide. I pray he remains strong and does not succumb to such an end. It was just the other day a Christian friend of mine mentioned suicide and said it’s indeed a sin to take your own life, thus being sent to hell.
But I personally question that notion, and that a Christian can overcome suicide and make it to heaven? It was a few years ago that I read here on Testimony Share a story submitted by a young Christian girl whose brother had taken his own life. He too, was a Christian, but was suffering from severe depression. His sister was left grieving for such a long time, but at one point she had a vision in a dream whereby her brother spoke to her saying he was fine and was accepted into heaven. All of her worries were finally put to rest.
I decided to google who in the Bible struggled with suicide? And I found this:
Several individuals in the Bible expressed a desire for death or committed suicide, including Samson (who brought down a temple to kill himself and his enemies), Saul and his armor-bearer (who died by suicide in battle), Ahithophel (who hanged himself), Zimri (who burned his palace down around him), and Judas Iscariot (who hanged himself after betraying Jesus).
I also found this:
Pastors, Too! Pastors aren’t immune to the rising suicide rates. More than half of pastors have counseled people who were later diagnosed with a mental illness (59 percent), and about a quarter say they’ve experienced some type of mental illness themselves (23 percent). According to LifeWay, 12 percent have been diagnosed with a mental health condition. Chuck Hannaford, a clinical psychologist who consults for the Southern Baptist Convention (SBC), said he believes the rate of Pastor Suicides has increased during his 30 years of practice. And he expects the number will continue to rise.
So, Emory what is your, or others, understanding on this subject matter?
Luke,
Continuing to pray and believe for Plavious that he experiences freedom.
I recall the testimony you’re referring to and there are many who have told stories here about the subject.
If we’re walking in a relationship with God and trusting him, it’s hard to see how someone gets to that point. But, If someone decides to commit suicide, I believe they are acting in disobedience to God. How God judges people who believe but struggle with mental illness, I don’t think anyone can say for certain. From scripture, I trust that He looks on the heart and judges righteously. His ability to judge is profound and goes beyond our understanding, that is, his thoughts and ways are higher than ours. I am cautious when I hear someone say, “whoever does X, goes to hell.” So, my answer is I don’t know how He will judge each individual in cases like this.
What do you think, Luke?
I love your comments Emory, so well stated! As you said, “If someone decides to commit suicide, I believe they are acting in disobedience to God”. Yes, I do agree! But for the way in which God judges those who are Christians, but still struggle with mental illness, I believe He will look upon their hearts – (it’s always about the heart!) – and judge each one’s heart with His righteousness.
Some key perspectives on Christians and suicide:
Theological View: Suicide is considered “self-murder” or a violation of the Sixth Commandment (You shall not kill), but it is not viewed as the “unforgivable sin” (blasphemy against the Holy Spirit).
Mental Health Context: Many Christian perspectives now acknowledge that suicide often stems from severe despair, chemical imbalances, or intense mental anguish, rather than a rejection of faith.
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Emory you also said, “His ability to judge is profound and goes beyond our understanding, that is, his thoughts and ways are higher than ours”. Oh, absolutely! Which brings me back to the young Christian girl’s story here on Testimony Share – her believing brother’s long suffering with mental illness – not a rejecting faith – was understood by the grace of God, so despite his suicide, he was still accepted into the Lord’s kingdom.
That makes me thankful to hear of such a testimony, it gives me more insight, and to be (as you said) cautious. So I was cautious when I heard my Christian friend say, “those who kill themselves are automatically sent to hell”.
Amen
Are you saying you’re homeless? Because I was homeless as well. No water no food no shelter and felt like God had abandoned me. Maybe that’s not the case and it’s something else. Whatever the case, know that there is a plan for you. I promise you. All you have to do is ask God for help, pray, and depending on what He has planned for you, he will take you where you want to be in life. But remember, even if you don’t see it now, theres is a reason why you’re at where you are. And youll soon see that reason, but for now, you have to trust. Trust in God and at the same time, motivate yourself. Because we are all made in the image of God, we are all fighters and warriors, he gave us that strength. So no, do not commit suicide. And if you want to talk, I’m here. Maybe if you heard my story it will help you. If I heard your story I would know how to help you better if you’re willing to share.
My name is Plavious. I was born into a Muslim community, raised in the household of a prominent Muslim leader. Just weeks before my birth in 1986, a Christian missionary engineer reached out to my father, leading him to embrace Christ. It is in honor of that engineer that I was named(Plavious).
Tragedy struck seven years later when a group of Muslim youth brutally murdered my parents. They accused my father of bringing shame upon our community simply for accepting his newfound faith in Christ. Their hatred spared no mercy, leaving me alone in a world filled with sorrow and despair.
As a child, I was sent to a Muslim school to learn the Quran, where I spent four grueling years. The atmosphere was heavy with fear and hostility, but I held onto the flickers of hope within me. At the age of eleven, I could no longer bear the pain and fled to another community.
During my time at that school, a haunting dream visited me—a vision of a radiant figure clothed in pure white, yet marred by blood on His hands. The following day, filled with trepidation, I confided in our school leader about the dream. My revelation led to my capture; they bound me and plotted to kill me, labeling me as a martyr for their cause. Yet, by some divine intervention, as fate would have it, the ropes binding my hands and feet loosened, granting me a chance to escape. I fled to a new community, where I lived in silence, praying fervently to God, hidden beneath the weight of my secret faith.
Life continued, and I took on minor jobs and attended evening classes, striving for a brighter future. Eventually, I managed to graduate from school, only for chaos to erupt in my country once more. In the midst of the turmoil, I was shot. With no means to access medical help, I felt abandoned and lost. Yet, in a miraculous turn, God healed my wounds—though I still carry the burden of pain to this day.
As time passed, my circumstances worsened. I could no longer afford food or shelter, forcing me to seek refuge under a bridge, where I now languish in hunger and despair, my body wracked with chronic pain. Just five days ago, I had another dream, more vivid than the last. In this vision, God revealed Isaiah 46:11 to me: “Calling a bird of prey from the east, the man of my counsel from a far country. I have spoken, and I will bring it to pass; I have purposed, and I will do it.” This revelation came when I teetered on the brink of darkness, having taken poisonous substances, seeking an end to my suffering.
The pain from those substances, combined with relentless hunger and lingering bullet wounds, has brought me to my knees. In this struggle, I sought a Christian community where I could share my heart’s story, which brings me to this moment, willing to spread my pain in hopes of finding solace in His presence.
What substances if you don’t mind me asking? Do you have any type of like PayPal? Venmo? Something where you can recieve money? I’ll help you if possible. Even Facebook. Facebook has Facebook pay. My instagram is life’s a purpose. Find me. Message me.
I took Snippers. A poisonous agricultural substance
Sorry I meant my instagram is: lifesapurpose
PLEASE message me on instagram. We can talk, I can help. I can ask other people to help. You’ve been through so much, and it’s time for someone to help you. It may not seem like it, but your strength is coming from God, you know I just downloaded this app and the first story to pop up was yours. I feel like it was meant to be and I’m going to try everything I can to help you
Are you located in Lahore, pakistan. If you don’t feel safe answering that here, in the public view, message me on instagram: lifesapurpose
I googled the most recent attack on a Muslim country and that’s what popped up
Dear kelsey, I am blown away by your kindness. , I have PayPal (kyacubu@yahoo.com). Your offer means everything to me. I have sent you a message on Instagram, lifesapurpose, Thank you for believing in me and recognizing God’s strength in my struggles.
Indeed God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should change his mind. Number 23:19.
If it doesn’t work well, please just continue to pray for me. You message have given me enough strength.
Committing suicide is another way of telling God that you don’t trust in him, that you don’t believe that He gave you a beautiful life, a soul, and that there is no purpose for you to live out the life that God planned for you. It’s selfish. You’re leaving everyone who is in the now and all the people in the future that God had planned for you to help them. God gave you a soul, and you’re basically saying that you’re not thankful for that soul, that you don’t and will never trust God, that you don’t believe in Gods love for you, and so much more I can think of.
But, by continuing your life, you’re trusting in God, in Gods plans for you, you’re showing that you do love him and are thankful for everything that hes done for you. All you have to do is trust that things will get better through time until God has revealed why he out you through what you’re going through, and if that’s hard, then just keep moving forward for the time being, one day at a time. Focus on all the blessings God has given you.
You know what, I want you to wake up every morning and tell God five things you are thankful for. Then at night time before going to sleep, tell God what you were thankful for in that day. Don’t use the same thanks everyday such as “I’m thankful for this day” no, truly look deep into your blessings.
Hope you are saved? The first peace you can have is salvation. If you have not been saved, you need to first be saved. Then the Prince of Peace can then begin to calm the storm for you.
There is nothing too hard for God to do. Don’t believe whatever the devil is telling you about the trials but believe God in His word. He will surely bring out water from the desert. As Jabez cried unto God for help and got the needed help, you should cry unto God in prayer, and He will surely change your situation for good.
I pray that the Lord show His mercy unto you and rebuke every storm around you such that you begin to experience great calm and peace. May the Lord fully fulfill His purpose for your life. May the Lord begin to make ways for you even in the wilderness. May you begin to be favoured from now. May you begin to experience divine help from now. May the joy of the Lord rest upon you. May the Lord subdue fully every thought of suicide and death. May the Lord release His abundant life unto you. May you experience open doors of breakthroughs from now. May you return soonest with testimony of victory in Jesus’ name.
Shalom
Amen
Thank you. The lord forgive me. I yielded to pressure. Pray for me. I may not be here always. Remember my name and always pray for me..
God has been silence on my case for decades.
“Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faithful that promised;)” Hebrews 10:23 KJV
“He hath made every thing beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end” Ecclesiastes 3:11 KJV
Plavious, keep your hope and faith alive. God will surely intervene and glorify Himself. He is our present help in the time of trouble. Whenever our victory is closer, the battle always gets toughest. If one persist further then one will sing the song of victory. So, don’t give up. You have waited on the Lord all these long and you are closer to your victory. Don’t let the devil rob you of your victory. Keep worshipping God and reading the Bible.
I will continue to pray along with you. I believe you shall return back with testimonies soonest to the glory of God.
Shalom
Mr Plavious keep looking on to Jesus the author and finisher of our faith. He understands, he sees and knows exactly what’s happening to you. Remember the promise, I will never leave you nor forsake. He said that because he knows we will find ourselves in situation that look unbearable and our circumstances will be louder.
praying for you.
Posting what Plavious sent through as testimony submissions recently:
I have prayed and I have fasted, but God has ignored me. I can not fight this battle anymore.
Is this i am going through not enough? Lord, why can’t you take my life. It is better for me to die than to live. I have no strength left, there is no hope left for my future. I am cursed and unworthy of life. I wish I hadn’t been born. My life is a total failure. I hate myself, i hate creation.
This world is too painful. I was able to try another substance. I am anxious to go. I won’t have to worry about this the pains, the cold, the stomach or even tomorrow.
Rather pray that I leave soon. I am done trying.
“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” Matthew 11:28 KJV
Keep trusting God. Don’t give up. God will surely intervene. God will surely make way for you.
Shalom
To everyone who has stood by me: I am writing this through tears of overwhelming gratitude. I am so lost in my disobedience and despair that I tried to end my own life, but even in my darkest hour, God refused to let me go. He has finally answered.
I am now receiving the medical care I so desperately needed. The physical pain is still agonizing, but my heart is overflowing because a kind soul, an angel on earth stepped forward and paid for my entire treatment in full.
Please, I beg you, do not stop praying for me. I am still pleading with God for total restoration and complete healing. I am also trusting Him for my next steps, for food to sustain me and a safe place to call home once I am discharged.
Thank you for not giving up on me when I had given up on myself.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And then peace of God, which transcends all understnding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7 NIV
“Shall I bring to the birth, and not cause to bring forth? saith the LORD: shall I cause to bring forth, and shut the womb? saith thy God” Isaiah 66:9 KJV
Thank God for His faithfulness. God who has began the work will surely perfect everything to His glory. He is Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. Whatever He begins, He always finish it. You don’t need to be too anxious but just need to continue presenting your requests unto God and have faith in Him. God shall fully calm the storm.
I will continue to pray along with you. Don’t lose hope and faith. All things are possible to them that believe. Waiting for the testimony of your all round transformation in Jesus name.
Shalom
The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love” (Psalm 103:8). I grasp onto that. Even when my emotions scream otherwise. God’s love is bigger than my pain, hid mercy greater than my failures.
I know he is there, watching over me. Lord help me to trust You, to hold on, and to find peace in the midst of this storm. Lord, in this dark night of the soul. It feels like You have turned Your face away from me, and the silence is deafening. The pain is suffocating, the weight of it all crushing me. Have mercy on me. Amen
I will keep trusting and asking for mercy.
I am out of the hospital. Back to the street. Life is very difficult for me. It is two days on the street already.
Pray that the lord have his way on me.
Lord, i thank you for giving me life again, I thank you coming to earth to show me the light. Father thank you for healing me from poison and for removing that suicidal though in me.
Thank you lord for a new me. Father the time to favor me, the set time has come. Raise people of my counsel from the East, west, Noth and South. People who will stand up for me and give me a new lift. Help me to move to a safer place and give me the grace to save you all the days of my life.
Amen
May the Lord grant all your requests. May you fully fulfill the purpose of God for your life in Jesus’ name.
Shalom
Beloved,
I am writing to pour out my heart in repentance and humility. I am deeply sorry for my recent outburst, driven by desperation and ignorance. I didn’t consider the impact of my words, and for that, I ask for your forgiveness and the forgiveness of those I may have hurt.
Your love and prayers have been my refuge, and I am grateful for your continued support. I am still reeling from the effects of the poison I took, and my heart aches with the fear of reliving that darkness.
From now on, I will choose to focus on reading the testimonies of others and lifting them up in prayer, rather than sharing my own struggles. May my silence be a testament to my trust in God’s sovereignty.
The lord have mercy on me, and guide me through this wilderness. I trust in his goodness and love.
Love and prayers,