Hi, this is my first time writing on here. This seems to be a wonderful website, and I have enjoyed much of the testimony that I have read. The Lord seems to be with you all.
I am newly married, have been for only 3 months. I have entered a difficult time in my life and am having faith that God will make all well.
For the last few weeks, I had been wondering about where I stood with my wife. Eventually I told her that I felt I was not a priority to her and that there were several others in her life including herself that come before me. I have felt neglected and taken for granted. I do love her unconditionally with all my heart and try to show her that daily, however I have not felt the same way.
She opened up to me when I come to her about this and informed me that her heart had been wounded from a previous relationship and with all the worrying about other things and convictions from her past, she wasn’t able to give me all of herself at the moment. She informed me that she thought she was not ready yet to marry when we did, but that she did not want to lose me.
This really crushed me at the time and broke my heart. This was last week. I told her this was so hard for me because I had never in my life been the center of someone’s attention or a real importance to anyone (including parents), so when we married, I thought I had found it in her.
I have been going to the Lord for strength and guidance and do feel better. She is also seeking the Lord to take care of her heart and give her that love for me that she and I desire. We are going to counseling starting in a couple of weeks, but I can’t say that I am yet 100% confident in the end result. We have been open with each other and get along. We know what each of us must do and are committed to it. I just hope and pray all is well soon.
Sorry to ramble on, but if anyone has any words of encouragement and strength, I would truly appreciate it. This is a hard time for me. Thank you so much for your time.
First of all, I think you are doing the right thing by going to counseling. If there are unresolved issues that were brought into your marriage, this is going to be the best way to get them resolved. Other than that, keep turning to the Lord and telling Him that you trust Him to take care of this situation. He will, so long as you surrender it to Him and don’t insist on your own way. His way is best, and one day that will be clear to you. Read the 23rd Psalm to remind yourself of His faithfulness through thick and thin. And encourage people to keep you in their prayers. I will be praying for you!
Hello my brother,
I would love to pray and intercede for you but I need your name, you can contact me via my email if you want me to do so.
“And not only so, but we glory
in tribulations also: knowing that
tribulation worketh patience;
And patience, experience;
and experience, hope:
And hope maketh not
ashamed; because the love of God
is shed abroad in our hearts by the
Holy Ghost which is given unto us.”
Romans 5:3-5
Since I became a Chrisitan the Lord has taken me through some amazing times in my life, but he has also taken me through some incredibly tough times and tribulations. I know I cannot possibly start to imagine how you feel and how hard things have been for you, but
never forget this, the Lord has promised in His WORD that “we know that all things work together for good of them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28)
You see, the Lord will constantly test us to see what is really in our hearts and to build our character so we can better serve him according to the purpose HE has for our lives. Don’t bet afraid, In His word God promises that he will never put you trough a test that is too difficult for you to pass. Strenghten and deposit all your faith in him and he will never let you down.
I will be praying for you and your wife. The best thing you can is turn to the Lord and pray, ask for his guidance and his love. Have faith and you will see how all things will work out for the good of you both who love the Lord!
Man! I sure can sympathise with you. By the end of this reply I hope the Lord has come with some understanding of the emotional pain that you must be going through. What ever you do, you must understand my meaning, because english is not my natural language.
You must understand that love is like the seed, it starts small and if you nourish it will grow into a beautiful plant or tree..whatever. The natural attraction in us humans is almost the opposite, it a big bang first and as time goes by it starts to diminish, the novelty wears off and if you dont back that up with love, everything will fade away, any small problems will escalate upto a mountain size.
Listen man, you must learn how to love, really love, and not just your wife, but every one and everything you do. To do this you must learn first how to stop holding grudges and the worst is hate, or hating. I am sure you know what I mean.
Back to your marital partner, you must love your wife as you love yourself, be patient and try understanding what is eating her up. Remember this is temptation on her side as well, she is trying hard by the sound of it, as you mentioned.
I pray the Lord God Almighty, the Living and Loving God to keep you both under His shadow and keep your marriage in a very tight knot that will last your earthly life.
I am gonna mention what happened to me when I got married just to show you that you are not the only one with a marital problem, believe me Satan is into every thing he can get his hands onto or into. But He, Lord Jesus is watching and the Holy Spirit is always by you no matter what!
OK. I am one out of 9 kids, yeh mum and dad had no tv in those days. But jokes aside, I always wanted a fairly sized family because my upbringing was WOW, we were loved by mum and dad, and us the kids understood and felt that love and we acted in the same waytowards each other as we grew up, even until now. Sure we had and sometimes argued, but who doesn’t?
Right here comes my punch line. On my first night with my wife, on my honeymoon night,she came up with this stiletto. “Put on some protection because I do not want any kids!” After such a long time courting and never brought the subject up, this was what she had the hide to tell me. I loved this women, I went against her wishes, “no nothing”, she hated me because I got her pregnant and had a baby boy(now 34), and she hated me for the 21 years we spent together.
You should see her now holding her grandson and is she a proud granma? Well!
Do you think I would have somethings to say to this woman, after the hell she sent me through for 21 years. She fouled up at the end, my love for her never faded, but greed got hold of her, all was done for. I am and will pray for your marriage, and may God be with you
God Bless you, son! How I wish there was someone who prayed for my problem then. Still I forgave and forgot.
Charlie
Hy brother & sister,
Praiz the Lord,
Keep total faith in Jesus our Lord & the Master. He will heal any kind of burden. Nothing is impossible to him. When I said “faith” meaning – you need to believe the “unseen”. Believing the unsean is the real faith.
We will keep you in our prayers. Don’t worry.
Kindly give us your names to my mail id: vishnuvardhan_28 at yahoo dot com
Visit our website divinemercysharjah.org
Vishnu.
My brother,
I pray to the Most High God and I ask of the Father in the name of the Lord Jesus that He will send you His Holy Spirit in all His fullness. Remember that the greater one lives on the inside of you. Remember that you cannot be defeated. Remember that you do not lose because the Lord is standed by your side. Remember that the joy of the Lord is your strength. The Holy Spirit is on the inside of you to comfort you and to guide you and to teach you. So that when you go the wrong way, you will hear a voice behind you, saying: “Stop! This is the way, walk in it! I pray that you may be grounded and rooted in faith. Perfected and established in the truth of God, having a vision and understanding of sspiritual realities. A pray that the mighty hand of Almighty God will be upon you and your wife to make you one, to show you all truth, to strenghten you, to establish you, and finally, to bless you and increase you and show you His riches of glory in Christ Jesus.
In the name of the Lord Jesus!
You know, if you want something to succeed, it has to be done according to God’s purpose. It has to be done in the right place, in the right time, for the right reason, in the right season.
If you married at a wrong time (before you were both ready for it), for the wrong reason (for fear of loosing each other); If you have not done the right thing or have not done it right; You have to pray to God for forgiveness. Ask forgiveness of the Lord for what was not done in faith. Ask forgiveness for not having perfect faith.
God told me personally something about a ralationship problem that I have been having for so long. Things seemed not to be the way the Lord said they will be. I cried to God for help, to help me believe His Word, despite the circumstances. The Lord said: My Word has been released in the spiritual, if you want to take it to your world, you have to do it by faith. And faith is actually seing and regarding the things of the spirit.
What did God tell you about your marriage? See the truth in the spirit and walk by faith and not by sight. And the Word of God will come to pass in your life. Amen!
Brother in the Lord
What God has put together no man can put asunder. Fear not, do not be discouraged. Cast your burden unto him for he cares for you. Just look up to Jesus, focus on the cross. Forgive your wife and trust in the Lord for your marriage. There is nothing too difficult for the Lord. Just believe because Faith without works does not please him. I am currently going through a trying time myself. My fiancee who was supposed to have married me in May just went quite without any explaination. It has been very hard but one thing I know is that the Lord has spoken. The Lord said he is the one and all I am doing is holding on to the promises of his word, although physically the situation looks bleak. All things work together for good, my brother – the Lord will not never make you a scorn of mockery! He is the same yesterday today and forever more. I know that I will share my testimony in due season and in the meantime I am concerntrating on what I was called to do – intercede- so your case is part of my job now! Praise the Living God!
Greetings.
What you go through right now is a test of your character, of how you will respond to your circumstances and how you believe in God’s promises. I myself is going through a difficult situation. I’m newly married and my husband is abroad. We can’t seem to communicate well and when we talk, he has nothing to say to me. I feel unloved. I send him inspirational messages but he does not respond. His silence is driving me crazy. What hurts most is he is open about his feelings with other women friends. But he shuts up when I persuade him to “really talk” to me. He does not say “I love you” anymore. He raises his voice whenever I make a slight mistake. I am the one who apologizes most of the time even if it is not my fault because I am scared to disappoint and upset him. It got to a point where I have a very low self-esteem… that everything is my fault… that i am nothing… It seems like everything I do is wrong. God knows how I tried to pleased him…
But I forgive him. I am going to stick with this marriage because it is what the word of God says. I will keep on obeying God at whatever cost. I cannot change him but I can change how I respond to my circumstances. I gave everything up to the Lord, I trust His promises that HE will make everything right. I will continue cherishing and loving the man who hurts me the most until the day I die. I will continue giving him my utmost love, respect, loyalty, trust and confidence. My hope lies in the Lord. He is a faithful God. I cry out to Him every night. I read the bible every moment I can. I am more active with the ministry of the Lord. I ask my Christian friends to pray for us. I concentrate on being a good mother to my son.
Whenever I feel self-pity and discouragement creep in, I rebuke the negative feelings through the name of Jesus. I only focus on positive thoughts. I forget his faults… instead I always try to remember everything good about him. I ask God to change me… to make me a wonderful person he intended me to be. I do not allow anger, self-pity and resentment in my thought even for just a single second. I know I am special because Christ died for me.
I do not know yet what will happen. But I am confident that God will make everything right… Meantime, I use this waiting time to grow in the Lord. It’s not easy. But I can overcome because Jesus lives in me and he handles the affairs of my life.
Well, this is coming from a person who isnt married, but who desire to be married. Please don’t disregaurd me because of the fact that i am inexperenced in marriage, but please take this hand of wisdom that i am about to deal you and meaditate on it…..
A councelor is good to have help your marriage, but our God Almighty is “The Great Councelor”. Any help that you need, he can do it… Now let me tell you where you made your mistake…#1..You didn’t consult God about the wonderful lady that you decided to marry; Did you ask god if it was okay to marry her? If your answer is no, well there is 3 things that you MUST do, and that is…#1 ask god for forgivness for not consulting him first. #2..Repent #3…Ask god to do what he does best and that is work his majesty..
May God Bless you, Brother.
I admire your courage, your faith and grace. I admire that you have not chosen the path of escape that so many men do; and that is adultery. God has called you, the husband, to love your wife as God loves the church. For the effort you are showing Him, your reward will come in the form of adoration and respect from your wife to you.
I hope you have already seen God’s light shine in your marriage and I encourage both you and your wife to continue to walk and talk with God because only He will surely keep you both.
I will leave you with this: When I first got married, my Bishop told me that the devil tries to break up first marriages because he knows the truth that you are forever bonded to your spouse for as long as you live and that there is no truth in remarriage because remarriage is adultery. Many are tempted to leave a marriage as they feel a little discomfort. Once you both commit to pray together, learn together and grow together, there will be no room for the devil to enter. You BOTH should strive to get to the place where the bond is so tight that the devil will give up on your marriage. When there is only God in the midst, true love reigns because God is Love. Distraction brings destruction to a marriage and I pray that you both grow to be best friends. Don’t listen to people when they say it is not healthy to always be with your mate. God made you both one. Like Jesus said to the pharisees, “they are no more twain, but one flesh.” See Matt. 19.
May God Bless and Keep You and your Marriage.
I am married for almost 10 months.i also had the same situation.I had alove marriage and bought my husband to my workplace.but as it was the early years of our marriage , the devil worked powerfully to seperate us.I was not able to take a proper decision at that time.I had a friend here and he encouragd me to send my husband.My aprents are trying to break our relation as they dont like him.i also request ou to pray for me along with others.
thank you