At the time i turned twenty two years old, and had been literally transformed into a new creature by God, through Jesus Christ my savior, I had a very hard time with other people. My tollerance for other people was very low, but not like how you might think about it.
The last transformation that took place I was sitting on the couch, and i had friends in the room with me. My mind shut down, and everything went black as though i was passing out. I went dead into nothingness but didnt fall over, I just sat there for a few seconds frozen stiff according to everyone in the room. As my mind came back up, and as though the blood rushed back into my head i could feel the tingling around my head as if i were wearing a top hat, and the words came to me from God with a firm voice with athority but yet gentle. He said ” You are free to marry anyone you choose”. I looked at everyone in the room, and they looked back as if to ask what had happened, and i tole them that God just spoke to me, and what he had just said. So i figured i would grab my new testement i just bought which was of a greek translation and written in modern english and look it up.
After looking for about ten minutes i found it, and it said “You are free to marry anyone you choose, even him who is in heaven.” I always found it funny that God knew what books i had and what i was reading, and to prove it was him would use scripture i hadnt yet read.
I wasnt really sure what exactley he meant by this, kind of like the visions they need to be sought out. I have never known God to help anyone outright at face value for what he says or shows, and am a little sceptical of anyone who says he does. It took me many many years of looking before i discovered the meaning, as God helps me to help myself so i will adjust myself to him, and then he can help me.
Often times people will just think the obvious about the messeges they get from God because often times it pertains to something that is going on in their life, but they dont realize there is a mission in it, that goes on and on and needs to be found. At the time i wanted to get married, and thought i had someone who cared about me. But more time than not other dont care like you would want them to. My problem was thinking that i would be cared about if i cared for others. I had always placed God first, and cared more for him than anyone because he was always there for me when no one else was.
As what says in 2corinthians about trasformation is very real as some people like myself are transformed and become very different from everyone else. This passege litterally talks about conversion as if a person where changing Church’s or joining one. That area within the bible compairs the old testement of law which became blame instead of a way to bless others because people didnt want to do it, and when cought they blamed others for what they were doing which was often times the same things they were doing.Â This is our everyday life with ridiculing behaivor to control us and how we act. Jesus came to complete the law which people didnt understand was meant by God to be a blessing, and took Jesus to help. What was written on stone made people hearts hard against God, but with Jesus this is taken away and a better understanding of what God meant comes. Litterally with some people the transformations or personal experiences with the Lord Jesus Christ writes this not on stone, but on the heart. What people dont seem to understand is that the bible is also a written letter and also hardens the hearts of people. It takes the personal relationship with Jesus to understand the bible and how it was meant to be read. So its a learning experience with lifes trials and the willingness to do what God wants that makes the understanding of scripture complet. This is transformation, and no different than Jesus in a cloud with Elijah and Moses.
After my first transformation i could read the new testament because of Moses, it just sounded to much like myself. Later in life when i finally got around to Elijah the prophet i couldnt hardly read about him either.Â Each event that took place from Jesus was a life experience confirmed by the word of God in what to do. Not really any different than what you read about the things Jesus did. The story of Jesus is really the path, the righteous path from a example point of view. He followed his visions as he said its not what my father tells me to do, its what my father shows me to do, and when he found that place he did what he was shown. When Jesus got it right his father told him. So anyone seeking the truth in the same way does exactly the same thing except we dont need to die for our father in heaven but only serve him.
Since i had been changed to such a great degree i had problems with people because of how they acted, and really didnt want to put up with them, but in this world its crowded and there is no place to hide from them. But i finally understand now that it something i do for God because if i could get away then i would be doing the same things as they do, and what good would that do God? Since i live in this most shamful world almost unbearable to me i show God i strive to stay what he made me and not give into what the world thinks i am.
I had decided to make someone like myself so i wouldnt be so lonely, and i found a girl who was about eleven years old and thought she was not so corrupted that it might work. I told her i could prove God existed, and she only needed to think of something and God would tell me what it was. She had thought of her thought, and i struggled at first but then a faint wisper i heard and so faint it was i thought it was my own thoughts at first. I told her that she liked me because these were the words i heard, and she told me no, that wasnt it. So i asked her what she thought, and she said that i liked God. This startled me and i turned around to see if Jesus was there with me, but he was behind the viel still. I do not know what effect this had on her, as i never saw her again. But i figured that must of been why because it did have a effect on her. With older people over twenty one the child faith fades, as Jesus said we must be like one of them, meaning God is our father and we are always in child state having a dad.
Most people when they read the bible dont understand the full scope of the inspired word, they all believe that the bible was written by men inspired by God but they dont know anyone who is fully inspired or what it means to be inspired. Inspired means to strugle with the choices in life, but instead of doing what we think is right, we get help from God. We choose what we do, and God tells us if we get it right, and if we think the right thought about something he tells us its right but only if we seek his wisdom above anything else. Rightouse is right choice.
Its not that i couldnt transform someone else in this manner, its that God is jealous of who he cares about and where my attention goes. The ability to be transfored is a open mind and willingness to learn, if those things can not be there for whatever reason it wont happen. So in my search for others like myself isnt going to happen becaus they are to few, and are not living now. By the time the next one comes he will be reading about me. God must from time to time have those people who fully understand the bible, and live it within their own life by the same inspired word. This keeps the bible straight and whats tought about it right. Unless their is someone who has done this, you really dont know. Only they can tell you.
May God bless you, and keep you forever.