Girl in Field of Flowers - Sad

I Was a Pretender

Hey there, I’m Sheena and I’m an 18-year-old totally blind girl. Here is my testimony of how the Lord saved me and what he saved me from. Jesus set me free from being in the LGBT lifestyle. He also saved me from demonic things, eating too much, suicidal thoughts, and being transgender.
All glory to him!!!

My testimony of how I came to faith in Jesus Christ, my Lord and Saviour:

Hello, my name is Sheena Critipaul, and I am so glad to get this opportunity to share my testimony (of how I came to the saving grace and knowledge of my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ) with you!!! (As the scriptures say, “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.”). Those written words came from the mouth of God, written by Paul, as a letter to the Ephesians in Ephesians chapter 2, verses 8 and 9.

I have seen these scriptures play out in my own life. I would first like to point out… I am not one of the experts in theology; trust me, I have had to open the Word, time and time again, going back and forth across God’s own writings, breathed from His own perfect lips, through the inspiration of the Holy Spirit (2 Timothy chapter 3, verse 16…)

I am not to be called worthy whatsoever!!! I have done things that I am not proud of; I have lied, cheated, done dirty things that have been deserving of death in the old testament… how then can I ever be called a servant of The Most High God? How can I have ever been described as “good and faithful?”

It is only by the grace and the everlasting mercy of Jesus Christ, to intercede on my behalf to The Father. It was only by the Holy Spirit did I get convicted… It was only by the love of God!!! I am so grateful!!!

I have grown up in a home of Church going people all my life. I came from the Pentecostal denomination, but I am now non-denominational. I think I said the sinners prayer when I was little, just saying a prayer…but frankly, is a prayer enough? I did not put my full faith and trust in Jesus for salvation. I did not take his free gift. I did not truly repent of my sins… I did not truly call out for mercy; I was a pretender!!!

Okay. So when I started going to high school, I started having homosexual thoughts. And then those thoughts turned into ones of confusion, and finally, into thoughts of borderline suicide. Again it was only by the grace and forgiveness (and even by The Lord’s righteous judgment,) was I able to escape the clutches and holds of the power of death upon my life.

I knew where I was headed; I now knew… I was heading straight to the gates of hell if I continued with my lifestyle. I thought I could seriously justify my sin; I thought I could say that being a homosexual was okay and acceptable to Jesus—the nerve of me!!! I was blind spiritually–I was terrible.

It was during the weekend of a Good Friday. I woke up, and found that my current girlfriend at the time–she is a born again Believer now–texted me, telling me she didn’t want to see me or hear from me again. As a high school eleventh grader who was 16 at the time, it hurt! Like crazy!!!

I then having all these prospects, all these dreams be broken down; I didn’t know what to do. For the first time in my life, even in a believing environment like I was present in, I seriously knew who I really was in the sight of God…a sinner. All the righteousness I’ve tried to put up, all the pretending…all the walls I’ve tried to hide in…all the fake accounts online…it all meant nothing. It, all, meant, absolutely…nothing!!!
I felt like I was being stabbed with the Holy Spirit’s conviction. I felt like…it just hurt. A lot. The Lord had to seriously humble me, and He still is to this day.

Two days later, while I was still reflecting on all the past events. I knew what I had to do. I went inside my room, closed the door…and told Jesus that I would make Him my Lord and Saviour. I remember clearly—it was after lunch. I was like the publican who prayed to God…”Lord…have mercy unto me…a sinner!” (Luke chapter 18 verse 13.). But after I did that, after I confessed with my mouth, and believed in my heart, that God hath raised Jesus Christ from the dead…I was saved!!! (Romans chapter 10 verse 9).

I remember going to school the next day…that was when the persecution started in person. But I remember two days before I truly got saved (my ex-girlfriend had broken up with me on Thursday night, I woke up to find out on Good Friday, Saturday and Resurrection Sunday were…just figuring out everything days, and on the Monday I truly got saved and confessed).

I remember telling my former friends that I had left the transgender lifestyle…I was still figuring things out about my faith. When I told them, they wanted to know what was going on.

I am still praying for their salvation. The Word says…

“For He saith, I have heard thee in a time accepted, and in the day of salvation have I succoured thee: behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.”

That comes from 2 Corinthians chapter 6 verse 2.

During my experience of salvation and my daily walk with my Lord Jesus, God has blessed me with spiritual gifts. Such as knowledge and wisdom. I long for more with my Lord, I long for a closer and deeper walk with Him.

Lastly, I would like to leave you with this truth: Jesus loves you dearly, enough so, that He would willingly leave His throne of endless glory to become a man, a human, to take on the likeness of flesh, to die a cruel and painful death on the cross for you! Jesus…loves…you! Never forget that beloved truth! Today—not tomorrow, not next week—not next year…today…is…the…day…of…salvation!!!

The Lord also brought me back to Him again. I was falling into sin, without realizing it. I lost my love of Jesus. But then, he convicted me through his Holy Spirit through revelation chapter 2 verses one through seven. And some of the other churches in revelation.

When that happened, God granted me repentance. He filled me with the Holy Spirit again, giving me a new heart and a new desire to serve him. He filled me with love and boldness and courage. I repented and believed and receive. But yes, that’s basically my Christian life since a year and a couple months ago up until now.

I love my relationship with the Lord. I am spreading the gospel as best as I can before Jesus comes to get us in the clouds. I can’t wait for the rapture, I know I have to though. Jesus is coming soon, I’m so excited. The Lord is telling me and teaching me to bear fruit for his kingdom. And to do whatever he wants me to do every day.

The Lord is teaching me about issues in the Bible, he is teaching me about things like divorce and remarriage, and other things. He is teaching me about praying for Israel. I love my brothers and sisters all around the world. And I can’t wait to see everyone soon! Jesus is Lord!!! Jesus has come in the flesh!!!

Psalms 36:5 KJV, Thy mercy, O Lord, is in the heavens; and thy faithfulness reacheth unto the clouds.

God bless!!!

Scripture quotations taken from the King James Version of the Word (KJV).

One Response

  1. Mike Henry Sr. 2/4/2021

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