Hi, I am Annalynne, and was just left from the love of my life. I have thought about building up a life together in the States (I currently live in Europe).
He took away all my hope to ever live stateside with him and maybe a common child, what I have wished for so long. We have shared our dreams for a couple of years together, but however, he feels drawn to a cold-hearted woman, who is controlling him. The relation with me has been a trial to break free out of his destructive pattern, but obviously he is not strong enough or does not really love me or just played with me.
The trouble is, it made me feel so weak, sad. left behind, thrown away and whatever. It is terribly difficult to overcome the general feeling of rejection, because I was treated very bad by my first mother and later by my adoptive parents. I could save my life literally.
I am half German half American, and the States are my home, despite due to my citizenship I cannot live over there. The relation to my American boyfriend has given me so much hope and faith to get a chance for life in freedom and without all the depression and anxiety and less self-esteem I feel here in Europe. In America, I am a completely different person with charm, hope and am optimistic and encouraging. All this vanishes as soon as I return to Germany. I have talked to many people about it, and draw the conclusion that I belong to the States. Folks, can you imagine what it meant to be thrown out of a relation to the man I love and to be taken away from America at once?
I feel like being in a concentration camp here and it is very hard to deal with it. Yes, I should be a strong personality, have a job as a nurse and am a student at the University, and a mother of 2 children, so I always do the best I can…
But for now, I cannot anymore. I know that I will live in America one day in a good relationship but have lost all courage and faith.
Don’t misunderstand me, I have survived my mother’s attacks to get literally rid of me and the hate of my adoptive father for being just a witness and victim of my mother’s aggressions. And have finished school, got an education and manage my day with my children.
But deep inside me I know I am on the wrong place on earth, and I am sooo tired of fighting, I simply cannot anymore. Maybe I think i do not deserve, but I don’t know how to change.
I know one thing: since a couple of days I the word “delivering or deliverance” is in my head and it has to do with my relation to God and Jesus.
I am no native speaker, but can please anyone support me and help me what to do? I cannot go down on that all what has happened. some very important change has to occur.
It will help me endlessly if someone support me or write a comment. I have read all the testimonies and pray for you all.
I have always been strong, but know I cannot anymore, however, I came to this side. My name is Annalynne and I am 46 years old.
Be strong dear.
In fact, you are a strong woman to have coped with all you said above.
Open up your heart to Jesus.
One thing i know about Him is that He is an expert in mending broken hearts.
Open up your heart to Him and let His love flow through you. The right man will come.
God bless you!
P/s: don’t hesitate to share your testimony with us when it gets better. lol.
Dear Annalynne,
Remember that no matter where you are, that Jesus is with you. HIS Word says that he will never leave us or forsake us. Hebrews 13:5 No one loves us like Jesus and no one can help us like Jesus. I will pray for you.
Dear Annalynne,
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.” John 10:10
I understand what you’re going through. In life everyone has a turning point that literally turns their life at a 360 degree turn. At this junction , unfortunately , stands a lethal weapon [ Satan, the master deceiver and destroyer]. His main objective ever since he was cast out of heaven was to destroy God’s most favored creation [ which is man]. Satan is very canning , He works through different medium. In the bible it shows he worked through animals [ even today , satanic worshippers still work with animals for revelations] , He works through people [ and what better way than to the closest , most trusted people in your life – like spouses, family and friends ] .If he can make these people hurt you, he knows your heart and mind will lose the sense of living. You will walk through life without love, and where there is no love there is no hope, and where there is no hope there is chaos [ because your sense of faith is completely destroyed] . Eventually you head down hill with anxious thoughts, worrying , depression and a loss of control to almost everything. This is what he wants for every man on earth to lose their mind. Once this thief has disabled you , he now comes to sneak lies in your mind since your mind is hopeless and confused, you will be surprised at how many wrong things you will be doing . Things you wouldn’t do before this circumstance. Thoughts that never belonged to your mind will just pop from nowhere and make you helpless. Your mind will literally learn to be helpless . Your daily thoughts will be deceptive. Its very hard to detect junction where you feel helpless , because your busy fighting the aftermath of your loss. Now is the time to get a counter attack to this strategic planner, and the best way is using a stronger weapon against his. Let no man lie you or fool you , there is nothing on earth [ no medicine , no type of surgery, no money , no kingdom that the devil fears than a person named as Jesus}. You have to be very canning than satan and look for a church , if you fear entering the church , wait infront of one and ask a person leaving that church to introduce you to their pastor . Now you must be careful, don’t just enter any church , there are many false churches , even the big beautiful ones are very deadly, because they act more like this world . You don’t want to enter a place that gives you emptiness which the world gives you on a daily basis. You must search for the real thing. And you may ask , what is the real thing, well .. You shall know them by their fruits. The ministry and congregation is totally unique. There is no way you can enter a place that has God in it and don’t feel at peace. If you are out there in the world where there Is chaos and enter a church and still feel chaotic , know that church has a lot of deceptive spirits in it. Where there is light darkness does not exist. You will be shocked to find that the small , humble churches that worship God have more Holy spirit in them than those ones. When you meet this pastor , ask Him first to pray for you to receive Jesus Christ, and i mean receive Him as the Key figure in your life. Christians at this point call that being born again. after receiving Christ, ask him to arrange for you to be baptised. You see baptism is very important, it is the key where the spiritual world is shown what camp you have chose for your life. Angels, and demons and their masters [ that is God and Satan] automatically know you are of the family, and each one takes pritiorties to know how to deal with you. In satanisim , they they eat the flesh of young ones as a gesture to show they are a family of satan. So you must be firm and choose the camp. Now the battle for your mind will begin here, Satan will fume over what you just did and send all kind of obstacles to try and torment you for escaping his camp. But the beautiful thing about this , he wont have any power on you , because the angels of God are not stupid to see God’s family tormented by fallen angels[ demons]. In the bible you will find this interesting story about a man called Job, before satan would go and attack him, he would first ask God’s permission. That shows you how heavily the children of God are protected. And the final thing you have to do is read the word and listen to the word of God daily. Meet regularly with the family of God to share the good news. When you do this, you will find that the usa man that you hoped for was a trap , rather than a blessing. I confidently believe things that leave us do not belong to us. They were counterfeits. You will then ask Your Father [ who says in the bible, if a son asks his father for bread, does the father give him stone or bread], here He shows that whatever you ask with confidence, so long as it stands to preserve and uplift your life, He will give it to you. You will have the most wonderful man who is protected and is in God. What better way in life than to have a spouse who literally loves you not just for who you are but for an appreciation for what God has given him. Such a man can never leave you nor forsake you because the spirit in Him is connected to this beautiful family of Jesus Christ. The USA man could have been a medium used by the devil to get you trapped forever and destroy you but now Jesus has come to give you life in abundance. Choose Jesus Christ and escape this trap set for you.
So true Alimoe. Jesus is the best friend we could ever have.
It’s simple. i hate to say it be it looks like you’re not ment to be in Europe. If you’re parents want to be blind as moles than more power to them. They don’t know a good thing when they see it. Trust in Jesus and he will set you free
Annalyne – if you are still reading here,
If God was speaking to you about ‘deliverance’ that means there is something you need to be set free from. Not many believers believe in that type of ministry these days (even charismatically inclined believers have a hard time with the concept of deliverance ministry!), so you will have to try and find it where you are, or just do it yourself. Look up Derek Prince on youtube. He taught extensively on that topic.