Blessings to you all in the name of Jesus Christ.
I’m asking for those who read this to just keep me in your prayers.
I have a very long long story; but I will keep it short.
I married a man in 2009 and we had a child shortly thereafter. I found out that he had another woman pregnant at the same time as me, left me to go to Boston when my child was 6 months old (only to find out he was in a relationship with someone else), and had women in my apartment and my car. What’s worse, he had no green card, and I was going to help him, but he didn’t help me at all with our daughter, and told the other women that he was married to me for only that reason. My heart was severely damaged, because I did love this man.
4 years later.
I was divorced, with my four year old, alone. But I was extremely happy. I was traveling all over the world, meeting new people and reconnecting with old ones, and I was in graduate school. Of course, I wanted to get married again to that special someone, and I felt ready to do so. However, I made sure I wouldn’t settle for less. I dated here and there, but any red flag I was out the door. I wasn’t necessarily picky, but I knew the man I was looking for.
I met the man of my dreams. He was caring, kind, loved my daughter, took me out, did things for me no man has ever done for me before. Above all, he was like my best friend. I was able to talk to him about anything and everything. He told me right off the bat that he wasn’t looking for a fling, and he was serious. And so was I. We had the same dreams and ambitions. I told him of my past and my fears of being with another man. He shared the same fears being that he was hurt in a long-term relationship as well. He told me he didn’t understand how my ex could treat a good woman like myself so wrongly, and assured me that he was nothing like him. And I believed him. Even my friends and family loved him, and saw a major difference between him and my ex-husband. I knew that this was the one I wanted to settle down with.
6 months into the relationship, I got pregnant. I was very unhappy about this because I thought it was way too soon and I was in school at the time. He was upset that I was upset about it; it seemed as though he was very happy about the pregnancy. I decided to continue with the pregnancy.
Shortly after my second daughter was born, I began to notice that he became very distant. Christmas, thanksgiving, and new years, he wasn’t around (he says he is in the military; so he told me he had a “mission”). Then I began to notice that he became very secretive, and he kept posting pictures of a blue-eyed child that he claimed to be his niece on his facebook. He told me from the beginning that he had no kids, so I assumed our daughter was his first child. However, he never posted any pictures of my daughter, but ALWAYS of this “niece” of his.
So now, recently in July, I discovered that a woman (still unclear as to whether they were together or not at the time) was pregnant for him before we got together. This “niece” is his daughter, and is 10 months older than my child. He recently lied to me and went to St. Lucia to see this woman and the child (I’m sure he’s seen her plenty of times before that), and I discovered the woman’s page and seen numerous pictures of him and her together, kissing and hugging and all that. He even went as far as to post pictures of her; he’s never posted a picture of me, much less his second child.
I’ve been trying to get the truth out of him, and still he won’t give me any answers. I was almost at a point of a mental breakdown, because I feel as though I put myself in this situation all over again. Now I’m alone with two children to raise on my own. I was raised in a single parent home, and I saw the way my mom struggled by herself to take care of the 4 of us with no help. She’s a strong woman and we all turned out pretty good, but I personally didn’t want that life for myself. I wanted my kids to experience what I never had.
Once again, I’ve helped him in so many ways and gave him my all in all, but I realize now that he was just taking advantage of me. I promised myself I would never put myself through this ever again, and here I am today. I have been asking God over and over why me? But I know my relationship with Jesus hasn’t been right for years, and I need to work on that. I just ask that whomever reads this just pray for me and my relationship with GOD.
I know I cannot go back to this man; I may never be with another man after this. But honestly, I don’t want to have a negative outlook on men. I have to look to God and look within myself. I know there are good, decent men out there. But I know that my relationship with God HAS to change in order for me to move on and be TRULY happy. I need all the prayers I can get. Thanks for reading.
-My testimony
Dear blessedbeyondmeasure,
Focus on your relationship with Jesus Christ and confess the sin of adultery with another man. Jesus said that if your spouse is still alive you are still in covenant with him until he dies; only then would you be allowed to marry another man. Confess the sin of adultery, lust, harlotry, fornication, and cast out those spirits and those that came in from generational curses going back to Adam and Eve on both sides of your parents. Break the curse of the bastard too. Break every ungodly soul tie and witchcraft this man put on you. Confess the sin of rebellion and witchcraft because of allowing this man to become an idol in your life (taking the place of Jesus Christ) and then turn from your ways. Also bind incubus spirits and cast them out as they work in connection with other spirits that give sexual dreams. They masquerade as the person you are most fixated on when they are really demons so in a sense a person is fornicating with them while in a dream state. The enemy doesn’t fight fair. When you lust after a person, it’s really unclean spirits projecting those images into your head.
Play an audio bible at night and all day too to clear the atmosphere from spirits wreaking havoc in your life. Anoint your home with oil and house clean (getting rid of cursed objects). Read up on self-deliverance and spiritual warfare. Win Worley’s Mass Deliverance manuals are available online and so are Frank and Ida Mae Hammond’s teachings on Schizophrenia from Pigs in the Parlor. Best spiritual warfare book there is. God bless you!
sweetsincerity
Dear blessbeyondmeasure,
I am so sorry you are going through this again. I tell you a short story. My ex gf is just like you. I promised I never hurt and I did a few times by getting weak and being drunk and saying foolish things. Not bad just about me and my past mostly. I am a good man who loves her dearly. Maggie is just like you and we are broken by of my stupidity.
I tell you first hand get right with GOD first. It’s a hard road ahead for me but she is worth the fight. God will restore you but first seek him.
I love this woman very much and I believe this happened to wise me up and punish me CB I’m blessed to have her. I have apologized but like you she has been hurt before. I admit my fault and take full responsibility.
I have faith it’s God will for us. I will suely pray for you and I hope you would do the same for us. There are good men out there but we all fall short. I’m here admiring my failure and I want God help to heal us. Don’t count Every man out be they will be like me. I made some mistakes but also its worst by of her past. In none will I give up.
I know her worth but remember God comes first. God bless you and keep your head up. Time will heal this and I believe there is a good man for you. I failed and I’m here willing to make amends. All men aren’t bad, just dumb at times
I understand that it must’ve been very hard for you. However, you do need to realize that maybe, because God wanted you to get closer to him, he give you trials. Behind those trials, are his plans which you shall seek. Always remember, God never plan bad things for us. And maybe the door for finding a right partner is still closed for you. However, once it is opened, when the time is right, I believe that even more amazing and wonderful things will happen in your life. But first of all, seek for his presence
Im really sorry you had to go through all that. I ll pray for you. Maybe if you ever get back to looking for the right person, hand God the keys and let Him take charge and lead the way. You’ll never go wrong. The bible tells us ‘Commit your ways unto the Lord and He will make our paths straight’ and we serve a God who can never lie.