I have been a Christian for nearly as long as I can remember; probably since I was about 6 or 7. I truly believe that my sins were buried with Jesus, and He is alive today. But I have a problem: I have embraced the gospel, but I don’t have a moment or a date I can point to as the instant I became part of God’s kingdom. I don’t remember that defining moment at all.
The people who I have heard give testimonies of their salvation all seem to have a dramatic tale to tell, when they “used to be a terrible terrible sinner, but God changed them dramatically” and they “saw the light.” It had always made me feel like I was missing out on something big, and that I haven’t experienced the full transformation of salvation. This has always planted a seed of doubt in my heart about my ability to serve God correctly, and if I am even saved or not. In America, we have everything we could possibly want or need, and because of this I often find myself not relying on God for anything, and that scares me.
How do I know whether I am saved or not if God isn’t doing anything radical in my life, and I find myself sinning a lot? I am really struggling right now! I definitely have felt the Holy Spirit moving before and I was baptized when I was 13, and I have grown a lot spiritually since then. But I have gone through really intense seasons of fear and doubt, especially over whether or not I am actually accepted by God as one of His children because of the ordinary, non-transformatory circumstance of my salvation. I desperately want God to use me for His glory, but I ask myself all the time – why would He choose ME?
I am extremely shy about sharing God’s Word with others, and I have no great testimony or influence. It breaks my heart just to think about it. If anyone has struggled with the same thing (or even if you haven’t) and can offer me some Scriptural encouragement, I would really appreciate it! Thank you so much for reading! 🙂
“Go to the village ahead of you, and at once you will find a donkey tied there, with her colt by her. Untie them and bring them to me.If anyone says anything to you, say that the Lord needs them, and he will send them right away.”Matthew 21:2,3
The Lord sent His disciples to find not a rare horse breed,or the finest camel..no he sent them especially to find a donkey…
somehow the Holy Spirit spoke this verse to me as i wondered what to write to you.
Chelsea my sister, though I do remember falling to my knees and asking for wisdom to right my pathetic life, I too dont remember exactly when I was saved. No thunder, no lightning. Nope. Today,ten plus years later, Jehovah God in the Name of Jesus Christ is the most important thing in my life. I have cast aside every single thing for Him and WOW! if i had to do it all over again I would…
But the Lord guides each as He knows best for that individual. I too am very wary of speaking my faith to anyone in the fear of being cast down. these things are important but WITH the guidance of the Lord. HE WILL LEAD YOU.
You need to edify and strengthen yourself with the Word of God. Please do read the testimonies on this site “Take your stance against the evil ones attack.” and “Stick fast to His word.” These will help you.
And most of keep proclaiming over yourself “I cast down imaginations, and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ”2Corinthians 10:5 The devil wants you to believe that you are not saved but he is defeated long ago.
Be still and know that He is God. Keep in prayer and keep calling upon the name of Jesus “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” Romans 10:13 Believe. BELIEVE IN HIM
Cheeryleesa, thank you so much for your post!! I have long sensed the Holy Spirit speak to me in much the same manner that you have, but the doubts have persisted. The evil one still battles for control, (for we fight not in flesh and blood, but with principalities and powers) but I know that I am set in the assurance of my salvation, and that if I only have faith in the immovable God, nothing at all can move me. I very recently realized that although I have been saved for around 10 years, I am still a baby in my faith, too weak to stand. 1 Peter 2:1-3 “Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tasted that the Lord is good.” I now realize that I must get up and learn to walk in faith day by day and become the matured follower of Christ that we are all destined to become. Thank you for the encouragement, and I will take your advice and BELIEVE IN HIM!
Happy Easter, Sister 🙂
Hi my name is hayley i am scared that im not saved
my parents and my pastor say that god has prepared a place for me and i want to be with god and i don’t know what it feels like to be saved im scared that if i die tonight that i will burn with the devil. I want to talk about it face to face but i can’t. im ashamed that every one at church knows the lord and i don’t. can you all pray and comment and help me understand.
hayley, do you believe in Jesus? No need to be afraid, then. We don’t have to feel a certain way to be saved. God looks on the heart. What’s in your heart is what matters.
One of my favorite scriptures to quote when I’m not feeling saved is Romans 10:9:
That if you shall confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and shall believe in your heart that God has raised him from the dead, you shall be saved.
If you believe, go ahead and step out on faith and start acting on it, loving people, talking to God and doing good works. Your faith will grow and your feelings will get in line with your faith.
Praying for you.
Haley,
How Jesus longs to impart His peace and joy on your heart. He is right there with you.
The funny thing about peace and Jesus?
You have to accept it.
You have to accept Him.
Even if you feel unworthy… because He didn\’t come for the worthy.
Even if you feel unclean… because He didn\’t come for the clean.
Even if you feel naked before the world.. because He came to cover you with His love.
He is there.
He is yours.
There’s nothing left but to accept it.
Hi Chelsea! I agree with my brother and sisters who replied on your testimony. You must not doubt at all. I can’t remember a specific day that I was reborn, as I grew up, knowing Jesus as my Savior! However I’ve had an amazing mind boggling experience, but…as to your call out, I believe this will help you with your struggle!
Surely I was touched and healed by Jesus from my severe headaches(tomorrow the 5th of May, it will be 22 months since my last headache) I had a vision/s , I truly saw and Jesus and heard His voice, when he spoke to me.His presence was indescribable awesome! His eyes and what came out of His eyes were the purest of beauty, passionate love, peace and joy covered me!
Now, after that, I was completely stunned as to “why me?”
I quickly learned to get the answers from the Word of God. After Jesus was resurrected from death, he appeared to a Maria Magdalena(not His mother) but a woman, from whom He cast out 7 demons before! I asked myself but why that woman, why not to the disciple He loved the most, or to a king, or to someone important! Firstly, God the Trinity is the Almighty! Jesus can appear to any person as He wishes to. The reasons are not always clear to us, but surely …it is not about the person whom He appears to – it is all about the glory of God! God showed right through His Word, in many occasions, He used somebody who is not necessarily acknowledged by people or seen as important.
For your final peace in heart! The Word also says clearly …many people, even kings and prophets, wanted to see Him/or have heavenly encounters then, but… BLESSED ARE THOSE WHO DIDN’T SEE BUT STILL BELIEVE!!!That is clear…many will not have any of these encounters with God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit or then, angels send by God, as often happened to the prophets! So…hold fast to the words as mentioned above! Wow…you are even blessed, if you believe without seeing!!!The Word of God says that, and we know…God’s Word is nothing but the TRUTH! God will never fail His Word!
Chelsea,to you and whoever have doubt, about not experiencing or having a “boom” moment. ALL that is important, is to believe in what Emory quoted from the Word in Roman. 10:9. If you believe but there is not a specific day you can recall doesn’t matter. I can remember a day at the age of 5 or 6, when a friend of mine and I almost end up in a fist fight as to who loves Jesus the most! As long as I can remember Jesus was my Savior! But the Word also tells us to renew our hearts everyday and pray to Jesus to forgive us our sins, put on His armor and cover us with His blood. The past is the past, today is today – what matter is not a day and date and, or a “boom- encounter” or…or…or! What matter is where are your heart now? To whom do you give all the praise,power, honor and glory! If it is Our Father Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit as one, God says in His Word – He will never “chase” Him away who comes to Him! ACCEPT it!!! Jesus Christ is the truth the Light and the Way!
In the Name of Jesus Christ our Lord, who died on the cross for our sins, who was raised from the dead by God our Heavenly Father, I pray for each and everyone who’s faith is attacked by Satan, and live in doubt and even fear, please God set them free with your Almighty power!Let them accept Rom 10:13!I pray God that they will know, You will never ever let us down! Your Son Jesus Christ had already won this war – please teach us to walk by faith and not by fear! God, Your Word is the lamp for our feet and your Word will guide us forevermore! Thank you Lord Jesus that you hear our every prayer! May this prayer be within your sovereign will, and may the Holy Spirit fill and cover us ,so that we may shine your light in this world! Father God,in the name of your Holy Son Jesus Christ we ask that! Amen
Take note of Cheeryleesa’s quotations on the Word and again…take Rom 10:13 as a special word! God will keep His promises! He is truly AWESOME and He is the Almighty! God’s love is so pure and will be with us (His children) forever – Thank you God!Unto you alone -all glory, honor power and praise…Amen! May God bless you