My Testimony to Jesus Christ
I was delivered from a demon doctors called “Borderline Personality Disorder.” I didn’t know it was a demon until a few weeks after I gave my life to Jesus Christ, which was on March 23, 2016. I know a lot of people don’t like to hear (even good Christians have a hard time hearing and believing it) ‘it was a demon’, but I know it’s important to say it, because it’s true. I understand that it seems “crazy” because not that long ago – I was in the group of people that dismissed such things as “crazy.”
Hollywood has given us an idea as to what demonic possession and oppression is supposed to look like, and it looks made up. It looks like it’s not real and it’s just a fun story to get scared by – that it can’t really happen. We, as humans, have been conditioned to think a certain way about life – from the very second we are born. This includes the spiritual realm. This includes God – and our living God, Jesus Christ. This conditioning includes demons wreaking havoc on the unknowing. It’s not about spinning heads, levitating beds and crawling on walls. It very commonly takes the form of blackout RAGE, crippling DEPRESSION, overwhelming ANXIETY, inexplicable HATRED, consuming GREED – and I’m only stating (some) the symptoms of what I went through.
I don’t know other people’s experience with demons, only mine. But I can say – with confidence in the Lord – that if you don’t have the Holy Spirit in you – something else is in you. I’m not going to get into detail about how horrible my troubles were, but they started around the age of 7. By the age of 29 – it got so bad, I literally felt like I had nowhere to turn. I literally tried every belief, religion or tradition this world has to offer.
When I really started to hit rock bottom, I was even dabbling in Wicca traditions. I was smiting God a lot. I didn’t even really understand why I was smiting Him – when I didn’t even really believe in Him. I understand now it was my demon. I had completely let this demon take over my heart.
It’s a little overwhelming at times to know certain things that happened in my life – that made no sense to me while it was happening – make perfect sense now. For instance: I really hated a good Christian person I was close to at one time. And when I noticed that person falling away from Christ’s’ values, I was really happy. There are so many other instances that I can speak about, but maybe that’s for a different conversation.
After a lot of years in and out of hospitals, countless amounts of prescriptions, countless numbers of doctors and counselors – none of these things ever offered a solution to my “issues.” I couldn’t keep a job. I couldn’t keep a friend. I couldn’t live. I didn’t know how to just get up in the morning and just live.
I got up for years every morning, in complete agony. Silent agony to my friends and family (except my husband) because they didn’t understand. They just saw that I was young, had a house and a lot of animals and just couldn’t understand what I was “crying about” or why I was so “spoiled.” And I don’t blame them – because demons aren’t something easy to understand without spiritual eyes and ears.
I was tackling a “monster sickness” and people – myself included – didn’t know what to do. I just want it to be known that, Jesus took this heavy burden off of my shoulders. After how hard and wicked I let my heart become – he forgave me and delivered me from this demon. I can’t explain it better than a night and day type change. When I opened up my heart to Jesus Christ, and really humbled myself on my knees and begged him to help me – and He did. He heard me this time. Because I asked Him – something I had never done in my life, and I’m thankful everyday that I was led to do so.
I’m learning how to live without all the negative burdens that plagued my life for so long, but it’s been really easy. I take everything to the Lord (and no, it hasn’t been completely perfect) and He ALWAYS shows me the way.
I really do understand about demonic deliverance!! When Jesus comes into our lives–everything demonic has to flee!! Read my testimony at israellights.com
Praise the Lord, in the name of Jesus every knee shall bow! And they that believe will in his name cast of devils! Mark 16:17 & Philippians 2:10
Hello, thank you for your testimony. I have been praying for my husband who has BPD and mania and Narcissistic tendencies. I care about him a lot, I love him. I have been praying for years for him. We can no longer live together because of this. No one seems to understand. My heart is so sad. I want to believe for his healing and repentance. I know God can, but will he choose God as his defense? Deep healing is needed. I’m asking for prayer. I desire his wholeness and freedom. I know the answer is in Jesus’ deliverance, and revelation by the spirit for him. He must hate the lies . Asking for prayer. Thank you for sharing. Hearing success stories help. Not many understand.
As you have stayed with your husband till date, still continue to be with him. I believe you are close to the victory. Whenever one is close to victory, the devil will come fiercer with his storm to scare one so that one can lose the victory. Keep praying for him and I believe the Lord will visit him. He shall be saved and delivered from any of the oppression. I believe you shall share your testimony soonest.
There is an aspect that people do not understand, that is the trauma, oppression, punishment, harassment mental/emotional/psychological torture that a spouse of a person with a personality disorder has to endure. It gets to a time that you have to decide was is best for you as a person when the other person refuses to change. A person who consistently engages in hurtful activity against his spouse does not belong to the category of those who are pleased to live with her. This a real problem that real people are experiencing. I believe there are answers in the Bible that help guide a person in such circumstances but people who are understandably unable to see just how difficult and harmful it is, believing that they are giving the biblical advice for this specific situation, ask people to continue to stew in it. Many suffering people are ignored because they don’t bear the physical scars of their trauma
No matter how hard and terrible any situation is, God can handle it and calm it when we cry unto Him. As children of God, we must allow the Holy Spirit to direct and lead us in our steps. There is a solution to every problem and every problems has its unique way of solving it. This is the need for the leading of the Holy Spirit so one could know what to do at any time in any situation. God has the power to calm the most terrible storm of life.
Hi Kemi, I do agree with your view here also because sometimes a spouse’s life is in danger because of the demons inhabiting the other. In that case the best thing will be to leave but keep praying for them from a distance. The discernment of knowing when to flee is also from the Holy Spirit, just wisdom.
I have a saying “pray as big as God’s heart”
People with BPD and other Cluster B mental disorders are sick and their minds are broken. They need deliverance from demons and healing.
A woman who I cared about and truly loved more than any woman I had been with in my life abruptly discarded me for another guy, and then legally attacked me based on twisted facts, and outright lies. I kept saying to myself “this is isn’t really her” The reality is it was her, but she allowed demons to control her actions and God let it happen because she was unrepentant. I believe true deliverance only happens for a person who humbles themselves and repents before the Father as I had to do. Unfortunately narcissists often believe in their heads they are Gods so it is very difficult, “but with God all things are possible.” Matthew 19:26
My 15 yr old grandson has BPD. I never understood why he disliked me or why he lied and did things without remorse. I remember when he was 8 yrs old, he looked me dead in the eyes and said “I don’t believe in God” My daughter and her husband try to manage him with constant supervision and support-they spend every moment making sure he’s happy. My daughter said he has no regard for consequences and he’s impulsive, so I was nervous about him coming to stay with us for a few weeks, while they’re on vacation and then it hit me, “he needs deliverance!” I don’t know how I’ll get through to him, to ask God for help, but I plan to fast and pray before he gets here.
May the Lord send His word of healing into your grandson and heal him totally. May the Lord reveal Himself to him by Himself. May he experience the divine visitation of the Lord Jesus and his ife fully transformed to the glory of God. May the grace to serve God faithfully be upon him. May he fulfill the purpose of God for his life. May he make it to heaven at the end, in Jesus name.
I will continue to pray along with you and I believe you shall return to this site with testimony of his salvation and healing, in Jesus name.
Shalom
Jacquelyn. Do you mind giving us an update regarding your Grandson?
Who is the actual author of this article and how can I reach them for immediate intercession?
One thing is very important about deliverance. You must know that God is the deliverer and not any man. Of course, God can use people but God is the deliverer.
The first deliverance anyone can get is salvation. Are you saved? If yes that’s good but if not you need to first be saved and then you can then get other things.
“For through the voice of the LORD, shall the Assyrian be beaten down which smote with a rod” Isaiah 30:31 KJV
“But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him” Hebrews 11:6 KJV
The word of God and faith are very important for deliverance. It is the word of God that will deliver one and one must have faith in the word of God for it to have effect on one.
Jesus is our mediator, our intercessor, our chief high Priest. He is ready to intercede on your behalf. Come unto Him and He will surely intervene in whatever area you need the intervention.
Of course, God has called people into intercessory ministry, but your focus must be only on Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith.
May the Lord intercede on your behalf. May the Lord give you testimony to share concerning the issue.
Shalom
I understand what you’re saying, yes, it can be demonic, but I also feel that with saying that you’re dismissing a person’s feeling to why they feel the way they do. The, and sexual abuse from childhood can have a big impact on your life. However, I believe in God also and I know that yes Satan can use those bad experiences by attacking are minds self-doubt and questioning your purpose, worth, and value keeping you from the path that God has planned for you. That is why we need the word of God, prayer and fellowship. We need a relationship with Jesus to help guide and protect us, keeping us from the attacks of Satan. All the hurt and pain we go through, God will help us to use it for good by helping others who are struggling. Sharing our story and how the Lord took what was bad and used it for good. I just want to add I don’t mean no disrespect, it’s just I don’t feel it’s all demonic. Thank you for your story and God bless.
I believe you as I was godless hater of all religious people thinking God doesn’t exist until Spring 2024 when I had a dream.
I had not dreamed for a long time. In that dream a father of my friends who I haven’t seen in a very long time, meets me on the street, I ask him how he is and he tells me he’s returning from the military hospital, went there for results of his prostate exam. Dream fast-forwards, we’re on a parking lot not far from there, he’s opening his bag taking out the envelop saying he’s going to show me the results and the dream ends. I wake up confused by how vivid the dream was and how my recollection of it is clear (I do not recall any dreams, ever), but then I start laughing thinking that had to be the weirdest and the most ridiculous dream. Not only that the dream was not related to me, but it was related to a person I didn’t see for years and to his prostate.
Anyway, time passes by, weeks later, near the beginning of the Summer, maybe even Summer began. I’m walking home from the market. A dozen meters away I see him waving at me. I almost completely forgot about the dream at that point, I was focused on what I have to do when I get back home from the market, etc. I approach him, he asks me about my health, I thank him, asking him about his. He tells me he’s returning home from the military hospital, he went there to get the results of his prostate exam. At that point I’m getting confused. He tells me, we should cross the street and he’ll tell me what was going on. I’m probably having confused look on my face, probably mouth open walking beside him while he’s talking what they did to him how they checked him, etc. We’re coming to that parking lot space and he tells me he’s going to show me the results, he opens up the bag, takes out the envelop and shows me the results (point where dream ended) telling me: “Look here, up to 4 is the normal value, and my value is 6”. Now, I’m not even thinking about his prostate at all, at that moment I’m mind-blown, confused, speechless. I’m thinking how is this even possible, what is going on, who can arrange for the dream to become a reality, I’m thinking about all the SF movies and TV shows I watched and then out of the blue I’m starting to think about God. For some reason, I sum up the 4 and 6 and get 10 and immediately think about 10 Commandments recalling the movie I watched when I was just a child, movie left such a strong impression on me, but it was long time ago, yet I still remembered how Moses split the sea and then how he lifts up the stone and thunder etches God’s commandments.
So, he tells me goodbye, I’m probably having blank face of utter confusion. I get back home and I had a movie I downloaded from years back called “Interview with the God” and driven by what happened, I decide to watch the movie, finally after all those years. And in the movie young journalist, a skeptic, because of all that is happening in the world, decides to put an ad inviting God for an interview. He gets a phone-call, a male person over the phone tells him he’s God and that he’ll meet him for an interview. Journalist, of course, was skeptical and thought it was a joke, but he decides to meet with the guy and they do meet and he’s asking him various questions, man is older, tall, grayish hair, etc. And at that moment, I stop the movie and address myself directly to God saying: “If it was You, God, who arranged for the dream to happen in reality, is it possible for us to meet like in this movie, I have many questions for you?”. So, I waited and waited and nothing was happening, complete silence, and then I start laughing thinking how ridiculous I am for expecting there would be an answer. It must have been a coincidence, although very improbable, but I started thinking maybe some technology, maybe I’m a victim of some kind of prank, maybe chemicals, maybe something unexplained happened, maybe people really experience visions of the future through dreams and whatnot. All sorts of nonsense was coming to my mind at that point. Anyway, I watched movie to the end and turns out that older guy was actually really God and He was using a body of a person that died long time ago. I went to bed.
The next day, Sunday, I’m riding my bike by the quay and I stopped to look at the swans. Out of the blue, someone behind me, male voice, asks me: “Have you read the New Testament?”, I turn my head, older male, having also bike beside him. I tell him I might have read some of it both Old and New Testament, but do not recall the details. Then he tells me this, I’m paraphrasing: “Nobody ever saw God nor can see Him and stay alive”. So, now I’m getting really anxious and mind-blown and I probably had some odd look on me, because that other person, who I’m really a good friend with now, but we never met before, is getting confused too and it was a long break and he’s putting a little smile on his face expecting my reaction. And then I had to tell him what happened to me with the dream and movie and what I asked God the previous day. And he’s now getting confused too and he tells me he didn’t know he was giving me an answer to the question I asked God the previous day, he was merely doing what he does almost every day he gets out, quoting random passages from the Bible to strangers. It turned out that the answer to my question was written in the Bible, but since I was not closely familiar with it, I didn’t know it was there already. So, Milan, that older person, was then quoting for hours, teaching me about the ways of God, Holy Spirit and His Son, practically giving me incentive to start reading the Bible, since God obviously wants to put me on the right path. A sequence of miraculous events followed, even more baffling than this one, but too complex, falling into area of those quantum experiments whose results are shocking scientists shattering their comprehension of reality, impossible to described in less than few dozen pages or more, so I’ll just skip to what happened not so long ago, the reason why I searched the internet for possible similar experiences, which is the reason why I’m here.
Now, God did show me with another dream that I’m being used also to awake other people as I was a part of their dream. We met in reality and they were shocked just as I was, so what happened to me turns out to be nothing unusual as God has been doing this for who knows how long.
Anyway skipping to the reason why I’m here. I’m in Nazirite vow right now and I’ve been tested almost every day. One of the days I went out, after reading a chapter or two of the Scriptures to stretch myself. And everything was fine, nothing was happening and I thought to myself: “finally a peaceful way without any trials”, but when I was getting back I encountered an acquaintance of mine and Milan was the one who introduced us back in 2024. So we haven’t seen each other in a very long time and we greeted each other. He asked me how I was and what I was doing. I told him I’m in a Nazirite vow, he asked which church, I told him I was put into it by the LORD directly through one of the miracles that happened. He then asked: “is that some sect?”. I told him it’s not, so I’ve repeated myself, maybe he didn’t hear me the first time. Then he asked me: “do you want me to give you an advice?”. I told him that perhaps what he’s about to tell me will be important since his friend Milan was the one delivering me an answer from the LORD, It was such an important moment that started a transformation in me. Then he said: “do not become a fanatic”. I was a bit confused, because Nazirite vow does require full dedication to the LORD, I mean really full. Then he asked me: “I do not recall, are you married?”. I told him I’m not. He told me: “listen, you should find a girl for your life to be fulfilled”. Again, it was so odd, it was like he knew what I was doing so he was trying to seed doubt or move me away from my dedication to the LORD and I’ve noticed his left eye was split into two parts and was quite dark, he looked at me in a dark cold manner, very weird. So I told him as a joke: “listen, I’m in a celibacy right now and the way you talk to me seem to me like you’ve been sent here by the evil one to tempt me”.
What happened next was so creepy, I never experienced anything like it, not sure if it can be put into words, but I’ll try. He started to shake uncontrollably, Nikola is his name. His arms were shaking, his legs, his head, he said in a deep growling voice: “GET AWAY!”. I got so scared, I literally jumped to the side in a shock. My heart was racing so fast I thought I would die. I was out of breathe, scared beyond words, almost frozen from fear. I didn’t know what to do. We were in a street, which is a zone without cars, a walking zone, in my country, Serbia, called “LORD’s street”, lots of people walking by always, because it’s a shopping area with lots of shops, restaurants and such. So, I’ve noticed that everyone around us stopped moving suddenly. So, I moved my stiffed neck to the left and noticed people standing still looking, but not at Nikola who was shaking, they were looking at me. It was creepy. I didn’t know what to do so out of the blue I just said: “Oh LORD, please help Nikola, LORD please help!”.
Immediately after, the very instant I said it, Nikola stopped shaking and just walked away as if nothing happened. Other people around also went their ways, so I remained standing like that in the middle of the street until I managed to calm down.