Hello all.
I have read many of the testimonies on here and found them very encouraging. I have been going through a tough time myself and was wondering if anyone could offer some advice.
Well, my main problem is that every day I am depressed, I just lay in bed most of the day and stay inside. There are days I don’t even go outside or only talk to one person. I cry pretty much every night. I feel like I have wasted so much of my time doing this; it has been going on for like 4 years. I feel so bitter, like God has given me the cup of bitterness. I’ve been a believer since I was about 10 but didn’t get serious about following God until Oct. 2010 (I’m now 21) when I hit rock bottom and didn’t like the way my life was going.
I have experienced some healing where others pray for me and I start wailing loudly and it feels like bitterness and pain has left my body but it seems like there is still A LOT of it left. Another thing is I always feel SO ASHAMED AND REJECTED, like these traits have attached themselves to me. I haven’t been able to make friends at college and I’m already about to graduate; this makes me feel like a failure and pathetic. I get anxious and fearful A LOT and when I feel like I don’t know how to solve a problem, I will turn to food and eat a lot and/or waste my time on the internet or watching TV.
It seems like everything is wrong with me. I don’t want to feel like the victim but I just feel so powerless to change my situation and am so angry that God has not done more; it seems he has forgotten about me or I think
“what I have I done to deserve this?”
I’m not suicidal but it’s like I don’t want to live anymore or I just want to give up reading the bible but I don’t want to go back to my old habits that made me feel even worse. Could you please pray for me that God would wash my mind and brain, everything clean and take away all my shame, rejection, sadness, pain, anger, and bitterness? I just want to be at peace and at rest. If you have any advice, I would also appreciate it.
Thank you.
I will pray for you, Jane. Have you ever read any of Joni Eareckson Tada’s books? She overcame depression and bitterness after suffering a neck injury that left her a quadriplegic, through the Lord’s help. I find that reading a chapter of any of her books lifts me up. Her books are in most libraries, or you can read about her online. I also would recommend that you think of a small kindness you can do for someone else, and do it. I always receive more back in joy and satisfaction than what I give, when I do this.
hi jane,
you are so young to be depressed. but depression and agitation is a common tool of the enemy. get yourself soaked into the promises of God through His word. pray and battle that depression. God wants His children to be at peace. and it is the enemy’s lie and deception to keep you fearful, lonely and hopeless. Pray for strength and believe in the power of the Holy Ghost to renew you inside. God said, do not worry about tomorrow. Hold strongly to the Jesus, He gives hope.
Stir your heart to seek God with all your heart and you will never be depressed again.
Just prayed for you. “,
Hello Jane,
Your story really touched my heart because I can relate to how you feel. Having been depressed for many years and suffered from anxiety and panic attacks, I know the struggle you are facing. So BELIEVE ME when I tell you that JESUS can and WILL SET YOU FREE. I have been totally healed from anxiety and panic attacks and from the depression that was clouding my soul.
My advice to you is as follows:
1. Go on a 3 day fast if you can – if not do a 1 day fast and ask Jesus to lead you to someone who will pray over you. Tell him the purpose of your fast is that you trust He can heal you. Pray intensely while on this fast and rebuke the spirits of anxiety and depression in the name of Jesus.
2. Read Gods word everyday, spend quality time alone with God, aks Him to saturate you with His Holy Spirit. Spend time just praising and worshipping Him. Memorise scripture that deals with fear and depression. Like Isaiah 41 – ” Fear not for I have redeemed you, be not dismayed for I am Your God – I will help you, I will strengthen you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand”. “For God has not given us a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind”. These are Gods promises to you. Speak Gods word out loud and declare and receive it by faith. During your time in prayer look to the cross and visualise Jesus being crucified for your healing. Let that truth sink into your heart. He was bruised so that YOU could be healed. Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal Gods great love to your heart.
3. Realise that the enemy comes only to steal, kill and destroy but also realise that Jesus is greater than the enemy and he can and will SET YOU FREE. Realise that you are in a spiritual battle and the enemy wants to keep you down and defeated but Jesus came to give us abundant life – free from anxiety and depression. Accept this in faith. Say out loud, “Lord I believe that it is your desire to heal me and I receive it by faith, I believe that by your stripes I AM HEALED”.
4. Let your heart rest in Jesus as you meditate on his great love for you. Medidate on his character, that He is a faithful God who gave His only Son for who, what else won’t He do for you?
5. Surrender your whole life to Jesus, surrender your mind & thoughts, your body, sould and spirit and ask the Holy Spirit to take complete control. Ask the Lord to fill you with more of his spirit and ask Him to reveal His presence to you. He will make His presence known. You will start to feel the peace of God and you will receive a revelation of His great love for you.
6. Try helping other people during this process – as it will bring you great joy and is very rewarding. Even if it is something small like buying lunch for a homeless person.
Keep holding on to Jesus – I speak from experience when I tell you that He will NEVER FAIL YOU. I am a living testimony that JESUS is the answer for anxiety and depression. He has set me free and in His great love and mercy you can confidently trust that He will do the same for you. He has done for me what no medication could do – after 20 years I AM FREE from anxiety and I have the peace of God inside me. I can’t even begin to describe how good it feels. He has filled me with such incredible joy that it just blows my mind. He took from severe depression to inexpressible Joy – that is the POWER of the awesome GOD we serve.
Do not give up EVER – It is not by chance that I am writing this to You – Jesus will heal you Jane. I promise you that – your part is to believe and trust that He can heal you and He will be faithful to do his part. Nothing in this world can satisfy you like Jesus can – In His presense there is fullness of JOY. Stay close to Jesus, Abide and rest in Him.
God Bless You my sister in Christ – Jesus has not forgotten you – You are so precious to Him & He has a wonderful plan and purpose for your life. Please write back and let me know how you are doing.
Father God, I bring Jane before Lord and I lay her at your feet. Father I pray that you will give her a supernatural revelation of your Great love for her. I rebuke every spirit of fear and depression in the name of Jesus and Father I ask that you would fill her with your unshakeable, glorious peace and Joy that passes all understanding. In Jesus Name. Amen
Angelaine,
Please post your response as a testimony!!!! I was blessed from reading this, you have encouaged me and I am sure Jane and many others. I will be praying for you Jane, just know that there is no sorrow that heaven cannot heal.
Jane,
I will pray for your comfort as well, that the grace of God will be bestowed according to His will. After reading your request for prayer, you appear to be getting an additional spirit of bitterness to add to the spirit of depression that you have. When Jesus walked on the earth, He came to preach to us about the Kingdom of God and teach us that “faith” alone is what saves us. Because He had compassion and as a testimony that He came from God, He also healed many during His time here. As He healed He said, your sins are forgiven – go in Peace to some and to others – your faith has saved you.
I have been saved for a very short time but before that time – I went to God in despair, as we all do. I did not have a vision or a tremendous feeling that day but the next day I decided that I wanted to read the Bible – the whole thing – because how could I know what God wanted or why He did anything if I did not know about God myself. Not what I was taught by others in church or friends talking about religion – but what He says. The one thing I did believe in before that day is that the Bible was the word of God but maybe men had changed some of the words a little here and there or at least I suspected that. So I spent 7 weeks reading the entire Bible and my prayers started changing drastically. To make it shorter a story than it is – the point that I realized thru His Word and prayer sent me to Him again to repent for I had been a much worse sinner that I first confessed to Him. His Words, as I read them, made me realize that I was not worthy to be with Him in the Kingdom. Through His saving Grace alone, He sent Christ so that my sins could be washed away to make me whiter than snow. Seek God, He knows everything about you anyway – talk to Him and repent of those hidden things that keep you from Him. He will answer when His children repent because He tells us He will. Let Him talk to you through His Word. For me it has been the most amazing blessing and it makes what is happening in the world today – much clearer. Praise God for His Salvation plan.
Charity
Dear Jane,
I don’t know if you got some help by now it is May 12,2011 and i stumble on this site. i have been having kind of the same stuff happen to me. i realized , i need some one to help me i could not do it on my own. Jane, sometimes people do things to us and we have no control of it. i was so mentally ill.and remember crying all the time . i felt a black cloud over me. i can tell you what to do just email back . i love you my dear sister in Christ Levec 19:18 I Bless you in the name of Jesus Christ love Gina carson
Hi everyone. Thanks for your encouragement and advice. I didn’t know how to login again so I just posted this way.
Gail – I will check out her books & I will continue to try to do kindnesses for others.
gentle dove – thanks for ur advice and prayer.
Angelaine – Thank you so much for all your advice; it is very encouraging! I have not thought of fasting so I will pray for that.
Thanks everyone and Gina carson, I hope you’re doing well.
Hello Jane;
In times like this all you need is a song. Try “Saviour King by Hillsong” put it on repeat, below is the lryics, sing from your heart along and you will find out that your singing will turn into prayer and as you pray your spirit and soul will be lifted.
Saviour King – Lyrics
And now the weak say I have strength
By the spirit of power that raised Christ from the dead
And now the poor stand and confess
That my portion is Him and I’m more than blessed
Let now our hearts burn with a flame
A fire consuming all for your Son’s holy name
And with the heavens we declare
You are our king
We love you Lord, we worship you
You are our God, you alone are good
You asked your Son to carry this
The heavy cross our weight of sin
I love you Lord, I worship you
Hope which was lost, now stands renewed
I give my life to honor this
The love of Christ, the savior king
Let now your church shine as the bride
That you soar in your heart as you offered up your life
Let now the lost be welcomed home
By the saved and redeemed those adopted as your own
I give my life to honor this
The love of Christ, the savior king
1Samuel 16:23; And it came to pass, when the [evil] spirit from God was upon Saul, that David took an harp, and played with his hand: so Saul was refreshed, and was well, and the evil spirit departed from him.